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								  Synopsis by Matthew Murray (mmurray@cc.wwu.edu)


								   "Personal Log, January 8, 2261, Doctor Stephen Franklin reporting.

								   It's been fourteen days since Captain Sheridan was presumed killed on

								   Z'ha'dum--nine days since Mr. Garibaldi disappeared on patrol outside

								   the station. MedLab's quiet these days. The League of Non-Aligned

								   Worlds has broken up and everyone's going back to their homeworlds to

								   prepare for the next stage of war. We know the enemy's gonna strike

								   back. Rumor has it that this time's gonna be the last time. This time,

								   they're gonna end it. All we can do now is wait for the other shoe to

								   drop, or try and find something useful to do before the end. And right

								   now, short of hand-holding or a sympathetic ear, I can't think of one

								   damn thing..."


								   Lennier enters MedLab as Franklin is recording and tells him that he

								   is committing a breach of protocol, but that there is a problem with

								   Delenn.


								   Sheridan is floating deep in blackness, facing a creature glowing with

								   an inner light--its two tentacles hold him firm, and a voice resonates

								   two questions "Who are you?" and "What do you want?" over and over

								   again. Sheridan wakes up, and the figure standing over him asks him

								   what he was dreaming about. The man already knows he's thinking about

								   escape, and tells Sheridan he should give up the attempt. The man

								   knows Sheridan still wants to know his name; he says it's Lorien, and

								   asks a series of questions, eventually ending in the conundrum of

								   which came first--the word that created the universe, or the thought

								   behind it? Lorien knows Sheridan is still involved in the question he

								   wants to ask--Who are you? Sheridan is surprised Lorien knows the

								   significance of that question, and Lorien tells him the point of the

								   question is that there is never a good answer. He tells Sheridan

								   further that the question of what Sheridan is is easy--he's dead.

								   Sheridan doesn't believe him, but can find no proof, even in the form

								   of a pulse, that he is actually alive.


								   Sheridan refuses to believe that he's dead, and insists it's a trick.

								   Lorien asks him what the last thing he remembers is. Sheridan only

								   remembers falling, seemingly forever. Lorien tells him that nothing

								   goes on forever, and that everyone hits bottom sooner or later. Lorien

								   asks Sheridan if he hit the bottom of the abyss, but Sheridan doesn't

								   know. Either Sheridan did, and he is dead, or he didn't, and is still

								   falling. Lorien also suggests he could be in-between, and Sheridan

								   asks what he could be in between.


								   "Between moments," Lorien tells him. "When we are born, we are

								   allocated a finite number of seconds. Each tick of the clock slices

								   off a piece of us. Tick. A possibility for joy is gone. Tock. A

								   careless word ends one path, opens another. Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

								   Always running out of time. Yours is almost used up. You're between

								   seconds--lost in the infinite possibilities between tick and tock.

								   Tick. You're alive. Tock.... Well, it was a good life, but a short

								   one. Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Tick..."


								   Sheridan grabs Lorien and demands to know what's going on, if he's

								   behind it all. "Who are you?" he asks, and remembers part of his

								   dream.


								   "You're closer now, aren't you? Yes, I see you are. But closer to tick

								   or closer to tock? I don't know. Only time will tell. And here,

								   between the moments, we have all the time in the world..."


								   G'Kar walks into a tavern filled with people and the strains of loud

								   futuristic rock music. He steps over to a table and speaks to a man,

								   telling him he heard he could find information about a piece of

								   Starfury the man sold to a trader elsewhere. The man says it was

								   salvage, and therefore legal, but G'Kar wants to know where it came

								   from, since it belongs to the Starfury Garibaldi was in when he

								   disappeared. The man doesn't want to talk, but G'Kar demands to know

								   how he knew where to find it. When things begin to turn violent, the

								   bartender intervenes, and tries to kick G'Kar out, something G'Kar

								   doesn't like. Before the bartender can do anything else, a man nearby

								   raises up his hood, revealing himself as Marcus, and a short fight

								   ensues, during which both he and G'Kar escape. The bartender sends two

								   Centauri guards after them, while he speaks to another one about

								   another matter.


								   The chime on Delenn's quarters rings several times before she answers

								   it and Dr. Franklin steps in. She asks if there is a problem, and he

								   asks her if she is having a problem, since she hasn't had anything to

								   eat or drink in a week, which, although commonplace for normal

								   Minbari, may not be healthy for her. Delenn says that justice is

								   served by her fast, and everything that has happened has been her

								   fault, and she tells Franklin she is very upset that she broke the

								   bond and the trust between she and Sheridan. She admits that she loved

								   him and wanted to protect him, but thinks she should have trusted him

								   more than she did. She tells Franklin that her fast will continue, and

								   that should Sheridan be dead, her soul will join his, and she will see

								   him again, in "the place where no shadows fall." Franklin leaves her

								   alone with her grief.


								   Marcus comes in from the outside, and reports to G'Kar that the

								   Centauri guards are still chasing them. G'Kar doesn't know why, and

								   Marcus explains that he is worried for exactly that reason. G'Kar says

								   he thinks Marcus worries too much, but wants to know why he's there.

								   Marcus says he came to look after him in case he got into trouble.

								   G'Kar tells Marcus that he is planning to go back later and find out

								   more about Garibaldi's Starfury, but Marcus offers to do it instead,

								   since the guards are all too eager to find G'Kar. Marcus asks G'Kar

								   why he is risking so much for Garibaldi, and G'Kar tells him that he

								   is doing it because Garibaldi was his friend, and he never had a

								   friend who wasn't a Narn. Marcus says he's doing it because he never

								   had a friend who was a Narn--when he had them at all. G'Kar picks up

								   Marcus' pike and looks at it, accidentally extending it while doing

								   so. G'Kar says he likes the weapon very much.


								   The Centauri guards are with the bartender, looking through several

								   photos of Narns that may have been involved in the altercation in the

								   bar, and he eventually finds a photo of G'Kar and is able to identify

								   him. The guards tell him there is a reward on G'Kar--dead or alive.

								   Meanwhile, the man from the bar awakens--due to Marcus dripping water

								   in his face. Marcus threatens him, and demands to know where he got

								   the piece of the Starfury.


								   Delenn arrives in Captain Sheridan's quarters, where Franklin is going

								   through Sheridan's personal effects on Ivanova's orders. While looking

								   through Sheridan's files, he found something he felt Delenn should

								   see. He hands her a data crystal which she plays as soon as Franklin

								   leaves.


								   "Personal log," says Sheridan on the screen, "May 14, 2260. We

								   actually had a quiet day today--it's hard to believe with so much

								   going on lately. Now that we've broken away from Earth, everything has

								   hit the fan. It's not what I wanted. Frankly, it scares the hell out

								   of me, but it had to be done. The job now is to turn this around and

								   make it into something positive. My dad always told me that's the only

								   way you deal with pain. You don't surrender, you don't fight it--you

								   turn it into something positive. He used to say, 'If you're falling

								   off a cliff, you may as well try to fly. You've got nothing to lose.'

								   And in a way, I feel the same way about Delenn. During the war, I

								   fought Minbari, I killed Minbari, saw many of my friends die at

								   Minbari hands. Here I am, in love with one of them. For a long time, I

								   thought about not saying anything, but... The moment my heart crossed

								   that line, there wasn't much I could do but see it through. Yeah, I've

								   fallen off one hell of a cliff, but when I look in her eyes, I let

								   myself think, maybe I really can fly."


								   Marcus explains to G'Kar that the man got the location of the Starfury

								   from Interplanetary Expeditions, and that person would get one tenth

								   of the purchase price. G'Kar says he plans to go to the place where

								   the ship was found to search out for more information. G'Kar says that

								   Marcus should go back to Babylon 5 and search for the person from

								   Interplanetary Expeditions, and that Marcus should leave before he

								   gets offended. G'Kar says he needs Babylon 5's resources more than he

								   needs Marcus' help. Marcus leaves as G'Kar lays down to sleep.


								   G'Kar awakens to the sound of footsteps, and sees shadows outside. As

								   they come closer, he grips his firearm tightly, but when they enter

								   the room, even though he gets off a few shots, he is taken down and

								   knocked unconscious.


								   Delenn and Lennier stand before the gathering of Rangers, and Delenn

								   tells them that, even though most of their work has, until this time,

								   gone unnoticed, they must strike a blow that will serve as an example

								   to all the others. Lennier explains to them that the League of

								   Non-Aligned Worlds has dissolved, and that they must find those who

								   still believe in their cause. He says they need a single rallying cry,

								   and Delenn wants it to be the Rangers. She says their plan is to wait

								   seven days, for any other ships, and then attack Z'ha'dum. They have a

								   small chance of success, but they must try anyway. She tells the

								   Rangers that, with this attack, she is offering them the same chance

								   to fly that she heard in Sheridan's log.


								   There is a knocking at Londo's door, and after taking up a weapon in

								   case of danger, he answers the door to find the Emperor's advisor, who

								   says the Emperor wants Londo to come immediately. Londo changes out of

								   his night clothes and goes to the Emperor's throne room. Though

								   Emperor Cartagia is initially upset at the delay, he tells Londo that

								   he wishes to present him with a gift. Londo attempts to refuse, but

								   Cartagia won't let him, and knows it's something Londo has been

								   waiting for for a long time. Cartagia activates a signal, and two

								   Centauri guards enter flanking G'Kar, who is wearing a yoke. Cartagia

								   says G'Kar is there for their amusement and that, should the amusement

								   cease, G'Kar will die. Londo, not knowing what to say, decides only to

								   thank Cartagia for the gift. Cartagia asks G'Kar if he has anything to

								   say, and G'Kar asks him only if he knows where Garibaldi is. "Who?"

								   asks Cartagia.


								   Garibaldi is, in fact, in a solidly built, round room, as if an

								   observation room, with no windows and a well-sealed door. Garibaldi

								   pounds against it, but to no avail. A voice coming from unseen

								   speakers tells him to refrain, as he might hurt himself. Garibaldi

								   asks why they can't allow that, and the voice says merely that they

								   have their orders. Garibaldi asks who the orders came from, but the

								   voice won't tell him. The voice wants only to know what happened after

								   he left Babylon 5, and Garibaldi insists he doesn't remember, but the

								   voice says his vital signs indicate he isn't being honest. This

								   outrages Garibaldi, but the voice only wants to hear the truth. It

								   asks him time and again what happens, but Garibaldi insists he doesn't

								   remember. Garibaldi loses control and begins smashing everything in

								   sight, including his chair and the lights in the room. His rampage is

								   soon stopped, however, when a gas pours from vents in the floor,

								   knocking him unconscious. The door to the room opens and someone

								   wearing a gas mask--atop their PsiCorps uniform-- steps into the room.


								   Londo enters G'Kar's cell, where the Narn is sitting in the corner.

								   Londo says it was foolish for G'Kar to leave Babylon 5, and that he

								   was followed as soon as he left. Londo tells G'Kar that, if he wanted

								   to die, he could have attended to it, but that, on Centauri Prime, he

								   will be afforded no such courtesy, and he will be tortured by

								   Cartagia--treated as a toy. G'Kar will suffer for days, weeks, or

								   months, but when they are done, G'Kar will die a very time-consuming

								   and painful death, each of his organs being removed one at a time.

								   G'Kar asks if the idea pleases Londo, and Londo admits that it

								   doesn't, and that it never would have. Londo says he would not wish

								   G'Kar's fate on anyone. Londo tells G'Kar that Cartagia is a monster,

								   and that he must be removed. G'Kar may be the means by which it can be

								   accomplished, but he will suffer greatly--something Londo can't

								   prevent. Londo tells G'Kar he must endure until the time is right, at

								   which point Londo will act. Londo asks if G'Kar will help, but he

								   doesn't answer. Londo begins to leave, and G'Kar tells him the price

								   for his assistance--he will help remove Cartagia only if Londo will

								   free Narn. Londo promises this to G'Kar, and then leaves the room,

								   casting a bright light onto G'Kar as he exits.


								   Sheridan, still trekking through the tunnels in Z'ha'dum, finds the

								   fire he set when he first woke up. He realizes he has come full

								   circle, and Lorien says everyone does eventually. Sheridan knows there

								   must be some way out, but Lorien says that the only way out is to

								   surrender to Tock. Sheridan says he can't die, since he must aid the

								   Army of Light in the war, to prevent billions of deaths.


								   "It's a terrible thing when your children fight," Lorien tells him. "I

								   warned the others, but they didn't listen. They never listen."


								   "Your... children?" Sheridan asks.


								   "Metaphorically speaking. Those who came after me. Children. Younger

								   siblings."


								   "How long have you been here?"


								   "A long time. So long... I was old when the molecules of your world

								   joined and called themselves land and sea and fish and man."


								   "You're one of the First Ones."


								   "No, not one of the First Ones. I am The First One."


								   Sheridan knows Lorien knows a way out of Z'ha'dum, but wants to know

								   why he has stayed for so long. Lorien says he's waiting for someone,

								   and that Sheridan is the first to make it as far as he has. Sheridan

								   asks if the Shadows know, and Lorien says they do-- that's why they

								   come back to Z'ha'dum. They believe they're showing respect, but they

								   don't understand. "They used to," Lorien says, "but that was a long

								   time ago. A million years." Sheridan says Lorien doesn't look as old

								   as he is, and Lorien says he doesn't at the moment. Sheridan finally

								   realizes his dream was of Lorien.


								   "Did you know you have a Vorlon inside you?" Lorien asks. "Well, a

								   piece of one."


								   "If you go to Z'ha'dum, you will die," Sheridan remembers Kosh saying.

								   "Jump... Jump now..."


								   "Kosh..." Sheridan realizes.


								   "Is that its name? I think I met it once, long ago."


								   "He told me to jump. Did he know..."


								   "That I was here? Almost certainly."


								   "How..."


								   "They can break off pieces of their conciousness and put it into other

								   organisms. It allows them to travel hidden through the galaxy, using

								   others as their eyes and ears. Kosh is in you, and he's part of the

								   problem. You're the other part. You're both still clinging to life,

								   both afraid to let go. You must lay down the burden of life, both of

								   you, and surrender yourself to Tock."


								   "No, I can't," Sheridan says. "The others need me..."


								   "You can't turn away from death simply because you're afraid of what

								   might happen without you. That's not enough. You're not embracing

								   life, you're fleeing death. So you're caught in-between, unable to go

								   forward or backward. Your friends need what you can be when you are no

								   longer afraid--when you know who you are, and why you are, and what

								   you want. When you are no longer looking for reasons to live, but can

								   simply be."


								   "I can't... I don't know how to do that."


								   "Then I cannot help you, and you will be caught forever in-between.

								   You must let go. Surrender yourself to death. The death of flesh. The

								   death of fear. Step into the abyss... and let go."


								   "It's getting darker," Sheridan says, and the light around him starts

								   to vanish.


								   "I know. You're close, friend. Very close. It's easy to find something

								   worth dying for. Do you have anything worth living for?"


								   "I can't see you anymore..."


								   "As it should be."


								   "What if I fall? How will I know if you'll catch me?"


								   "I caught you before."


								   "What if I die?"


								   "I cannot create life, but I can breathe on the remaining embers. It

								   may not work."


								   "But I can hope..."


								   As the world around him disappears completely, the words of Lorien

								   continue to echo. "Hope is all we have."


								   Sheridan then begins to reexperience his emergence onto the balcony

								   above the abyss, and his leap into it, as Lorien's voice echoes,

								   asking him again, "Do you have anything worth living for?"


								   While he falls, he remembers the voice of someone, a long time ago, on

								   the original White Star. "Sleep now. I will watch, and catch you if

								   you should fall."


								   Lorien stands over the body of Sheridan, outstretched at the bottom of

								   the abyss, after Sheridan delivers his answer, in the form of a single

								   word.


								   "Delenn!"


								   [14][Next]


								      [15]Last update: May 8, 1997


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